Effective Communication brings people closer together or ensures that they don’t get closer.

Effective communication requires you to become an engaged listener. That means changing the usual focus of trying to listen to decide what to say next. Listening well will help you understand the words being communicated, but a person needs to learn how to understand the emotions conveyed.

When you listen, you’ll hear more than just words; you will hear the feelings in someone’s voice and understand that more than terms are being communicated and how a person feels about those words are more important.

Listening this way lets the other person know they were heard and understood. Resulting in a better connection.

What is being communicated often has nothing to do with the words, and the real intention (motive) can be a concern if known.

Snakes have motives

Retired Rattlesnake Roadside-Romeo was on a dirt road in rural Arizona. On the other side of the road was a chicken.

So, he hollers, "Hey there! Babe! I don't usually talk with random chicks, but you should know I am a hundred years old. Do you want to know the secret to long life?"

The chicken is intrigued and asks, "Well, what is it? Tell me"

Roadside-Romeo replies, "What'd you say? Can't hear you."

The chicken says, "What is the secret to long life?"

Roadside-Romeo says, "What, babe? Whatcha sayin'?"

So, the curious chicken crossed the road.

And went near Roadside-Romeo's ear and yelled, "What is the secret to long life?"

Roadside-Romeo hissed and rattled and replied, "Oh!!! The secret is - Don't talk to strangers!"

And in one quick swoop, the snake pounced and swallowed the bird.

And smugly, he thought, "Amazing, I can still pick up chicks with that joke!"

“Effective Communication is not just for good guys.”

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Living your life is about reinventing yourself everyday

Our lives change constantly, and those changes are additions to our life stories that enable us to see past events differently and contribute to seeing our past lives differently.

“How you arrange the plot points of your life into narrative shapes who you are and is a fundamental part of being human.” This is the subtitle in an interesting article titled Life’s Stories, published in The Atlantic in 2015. In that article, Monisha Pasupathi, a professor of developmental psychology at the University of Utah, offered much insight on this subject. She stated: “To have relationships, we’ve all had to tell little pieces of our story.”

When we create a narrative about the events in our life, it triggers the conclusions new experiences and knowledge has brought to us. We could conclude that all we did was add clarity to what happened, but in looking back, we have unique insights offering more transparency, and the events themselves take on new meaning. Through this experience, we reinvent who we are.

Quotes about Reinvention

1. "It's never too late to be what you might have been." -- George Elliot

2. "When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be." -- Lao Tzu

3. "The reinvention of daily life means marching off the edge of our maps." -- Bob Black

4. "Change your life today. Don't gamble on the future; act now, without delay." -- Simone de Beauvoir